Find Your Beat and March to It

It's been a while since I've darkened the doorway here at Hippocrates Housewives, and what I'm about to say isn't revelatory or heavy in any way. In fact, I would wager that you've all heard or read it before. But it's sort of where we are with life, and that has to count for something, right?

Anyway...

My husband’s match day is in a couple of weeks. Friends of ours had theirs last month. Basically, the transition into residency is all we talk/think about these days. I’m not entirely sure what to expect, but if the posts by the other ladies on this blog are any indication, it isn’t for the faint of heart. To be honest, I’m getting a little nervous. I feel like we’ve just completed a marathon only to turn around and run back. Medical school is tough. And for those of us married to students, learning to juggle crazy schedules and absent spouses has turned into a work of art. We’ve finally found our balance and in a few short months, we’ll have lost our footing all over again.

My searches on the topic have been fruitful. There is a ton of info out there on surviving residency. And it’s all about the same. Seriously. Find time for yourself, focus on the future, stay positive, find what works for you, etc. All sound advice. I get the feeling, though, that it’s easier said than done and even then, a bit different for everyone. That’s probably where the “find what works for you” bit comes in. And it totally applies to medical school, too.

We made family dinner a priority and regardless of whether or not my husband had a test, we ate together and spent at least an hour afterwards just hanging out. Saturday mornings were our “lazy time”. No school, no studying. A friend mentioned her husband didn’t study on Sundays. That was their time to focus on family and got them through the late nights and early mornings throughout the week. We did what worked for us, they did what worked for them. It’s all about figuring out what works for you and what doesn’t. Family life doesn't have to suffer because of medical school, and grades don't need to take a hit to make room for more family time. It's possible to have both. You just have to find your own way of getting there.

I’ve mentioned before that my husband is about to graduate from medical school. There have been times when it’s seemed like the longest road in history. But now looking back, I can safely say it’s flown by. I’m wondering where the time went. And I know the feeling is different when you’re just starting out, or even half way through. I’ve been there. I’ve felt it. But for those of you who are wondering when you’ll see the light at the end of the tunnel, do something really cliche and stop and smell the roses. Enjoy the journey. Find your balance in this crazy life, and run with it. It’ll make a huge difference.

And on those days when you're super depressed, just go ahead and eat cake for breakfast. You are, after all, an adult. Act like one.

-m. quinn